Queen Totti is not one to be giving child rearing advice.
Sure, when you raise as many as she claims, it's easy to have one turn out badly. But two?
We knew Drucilla Dimwitty was bad news, with her lackluster parenting skills and her partying ways. But Nick G takes the cake!
Everyone is pretending to be someone they are not. Queen Totti is claiming to be royalty, and Nick G is pretending to be gainfully employed.
The Enlightened Ones have seen his work, and more than one has noted his strong resemblance to a Vegas show.
Showing posts with label Drucilla Dimwitty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Drucilla Dimwitty. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 24, 2015
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Robbing The Cradle: Rock A Bye Baby
Ahhhh, Drucilla Dimwitty... More than 2 years difference under the age of 18 will catch you a felony.
Queen Totti, happy to have the heat off of her, has taken the direction of the tweety birds in order to reach out to her people. All three of them.
She is still singing the praises of Drucilla, and what a beautiful mother she is.
However, the "mothering" part applies to her new beau, not her offspring.
Questions have swirled about the true age of Heady, her teen for the spring. Seventeen has been tossed about, which would make this Union a little less unholy.
Except a pesky little previous post revealed his age to be.... 15 going on 16.
Always make sure your lips match the words, because 17 and 15 look nothing alike.
"Mirror, mirror on the wall... How do you know this? His Facebook Wall."
Queen Totti, happy to have the heat off of her, has taken the direction of the tweety birds in order to reach out to her people. All three of them.
She is still singing the praises of Drucilla, and what a beautiful mother she is.
However, the "mothering" part applies to her new beau, not her offspring.
Questions have swirled about the true age of Heady, her teen for the spring. Seventeen has been tossed about, which would make this Union a little less unholy.
Except a pesky little previous post revealed his age to be.... 15 going on 16.
Always make sure your lips match the words, because 17 and 15 look nothing alike.
"Mirror, mirror on the wall... How do you know this? His Facebook Wall."
Friday, March 13, 2015
Shhhh can You Hear It?
The sound of camaraderie is quietly wafting through the air. No fights, no arguments, no public outcries of disloyalty. All is well in the kingdom. The reason? Filming has commenced.
Someone forgot to tell Fertile Myrtle that evidence of filming is not to be released to the public, because unwanteds may show up. Radio silence must occur for story lines not to be compromised. She did her best to hide her mistake, but Enlightened Minds screens shotted it.
Ironically, the only ones with missing time segments are Totti, Fertile, and Barbie. Have they managed to kick Josephine and Frick-Frack to the curb? They all despise each other, you know.
Don't count on it. Public feuding = Ratings Bonanza.
Someone forgot to tell Fertile Myrtle that evidence of filming is not to be released to the public, because unwanteds may show up. Radio silence must occur for story lines not to be compromised. She did her best to hide her mistake, but Enlightened Minds screens shotted it.
Ironically, the only ones with missing time segments are Totti, Fertile, and Barbie. Have they managed to kick Josephine and Frick-Frack to the curb? They all despise each other, you know.
Don't count on it. Public feuding = Ratings Bonanza.
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Hold Friends Close and Hold Enemies Closer
Dixie Undertire is singing her heart out, preparing for her upcoming Grand Ball gig. She smells blood in the water, so she is busy jockeying for position as the next Royal family member.
You see, Totti is busy behind the scenes, planning the departure of three key figures. Everyone is running a game on each other, and while the three amigos think Totti is just drumming up publicity to increase the Benjamins taken in at the Grand Ball, she is actually having them replaced by three she can control.
If Totti gets her way:
Josephine, Frick, and Frack exit stage left
Fertile Myrtle, Drucilla Dimwitty, and an unknown enter Stage right
Dixie Undertire is doing everything possible to secure the third position. She has tucked MCM away, and is playing nice with Drucilla Dimwitty. Funny thing is, if Dixie knew what Drucilla said about MCM, she would not be quick to side with her.
Will the three amigos see beneath Totti's lame promises that the drama is just for ratings and realize their days are numbered? Will Dixie see through Drucilla? Does Drucilla know that more than two years under the legal age is a felony, and not marriage material?
You see, Totti is busy behind the scenes, planning the departure of three key figures. Everyone is running a game on each other, and while the three amigos think Totti is just drumming up publicity to increase the Benjamins taken in at the Grand Ball, she is actually having them replaced by three she can control.
If Totti gets her way:
Josephine, Frick, and Frack exit stage left
Fertile Myrtle, Drucilla Dimwitty, and an unknown enter Stage right
Dixie Undertire is doing everything possible to secure the third position. She has tucked MCM away, and is playing nice with Drucilla Dimwitty. Funny thing is, if Dixie knew what Drucilla said about MCM, she would not be quick to side with her.
Will the three amigos see beneath Totti's lame promises that the drama is just for ratings and realize their days are numbered? Will Dixie see through Drucilla? Does Drucilla know that more than two years under the legal age is a felony, and not marriage material?
Monday, March 9, 2015
A Canned Interview
When things seem to be slow in the kingdom, Queen Totti creates drama to draw attention. She tried it with Cinderella, basically making a mockery of Cinderella's relationship in the public eye to garner sympathy. When Cinderella's life was stable, and she had actually started a family, Totti dropped her like a hot rock to find other suckers to wrangle.
Totti has gone on a public rampage, badmouthing her royal family members with insults about parenting and partying. Her new topic of the day is Drucilla, because she is the only other person who will converse with her.
But the biggest ruse of all is the lie the kingdom is asked to believe about the Royal family at this very moment. Each plays a character, such as Drucilla being the party girl, and it is quickly becoming apparent that their acting ability garners no academy awards.
Don't you find it strange that Josephine Half-Baked doesn't speak up for herself when Queen Totti badmouths her publicly? Josephine, who is no stranger to arguments, has not made one comment in regards to the public humiliation Queen Totti has dished to her. In fact, none of the other family members have uttered a peep in self defense.
This show is their livelihood, and is dependent upon viewers. The Grand Ball is coming up soon, and any publicity is good publicity. Are we the ones getting the wool pulled over our eyes? Have any Enlightened Ones noticed this odd behavior?
Totti has gone on a public rampage, badmouthing her royal family members with insults about parenting and partying. Her new topic of the day is Drucilla, because she is the only other person who will converse with her.
But the biggest ruse of all is the lie the kingdom is asked to believe about the Royal family at this very moment. Each plays a character, such as Drucilla being the party girl, and it is quickly becoming apparent that their acting ability garners no academy awards.
Don't you find it strange that Josephine Half-Baked doesn't speak up for herself when Queen Totti badmouths her publicly? Josephine, who is no stranger to arguments, has not made one comment in regards to the public humiliation Queen Totti has dished to her. In fact, none of the other family members have uttered a peep in self defense.
This show is their livelihood, and is dependent upon viewers. The Grand Ball is coming up soon, and any publicity is good publicity. Are we the ones getting the wool pulled over our eyes? Have any Enlightened Ones noticed this odd behavior?
Sunday, March 8, 2015
The Newest Royal Family Member
Things didn't go well after Drucilla's disastrous public spectacle, and Queen Totti realized she needed new blood on her army if she were to battle Josephine Half-Baked.
Queen Totti will be adding a fresh face to the Royal lineup. Meany Bigmouth!
Meany has taken the Queen's last name, and will soon be joining Totti in the Royal palace. At least, that's what she says she will be doing. She has officially changed her name in the book, and is boring everyone with the details of her grand coming out party.
Meany's story is believable, because she's about the only one in the kingdom that still likes her. Unless you count Drucilla Dimwitty, but that vote only counts as half a vote due to the number of lost brain cells.
Is Meany on her way to the big leagues? Or is Queen Totti grasping for straws? Meany can't claim she was hacked, because the proof exists otherwise.
Queen Totti will be adding a fresh face to the Royal lineup. Meany Bigmouth!
Meany has taken the Queen's last name, and will soon be joining Totti in the Royal palace. At least, that's what she says she will be doing. She has officially changed her name in the book, and is boring everyone with the details of her grand coming out party.
Meany's story is believable, because she's about the only one in the kingdom that still likes her. Unless you count Drucilla Dimwitty, but that vote only counts as half a vote due to the number of lost brain cells.
Is Meany on her way to the big leagues? Or is Queen Totti grasping for straws? Meany can't claim she was hacked, because the proof exists otherwise.
Friday, March 6, 2015
Everyone Wants The Truth But No One Wants To Be Honest
Last night, one of the Grand Ball preliminary events took place. Only parts of the Royal Family were present, but they were definitely enough. Drucilla Dimwitty, Queen Totti's fierce protector, showed a less than scrupulous demeanor. That is the nicest thing I can say about her behavior.
Meanwhile, everyone's wild child, Josephine Half-Baked, was the calm and courteous one. She was well behaved, and was a saint compared to Drucilla.
Today, members of the kingdom had sordid opinions about Drucilla's antics. Many pointed out that Josephine had matured, but Drucilla had digressed into a royal embarassment. Yet, Queen Totti was quick to correct people's comments with her own version of reality.
Yes, Queen Totti threw Josephine Half-Baked under the bus, and insisted that Drucilla had actually transformed into a wonderful mother. If anything, Josephine's current behavior was worse than Drucilla's behavior that was displayed at the preliminary event.
Does Josephine know about Queen Totti's betrayal? Would Josephine like to have proof of such scandalous claims?
Meanwhile, everyone's wild child, Josephine Half-Baked, was the calm and courteous one. She was well behaved, and was a saint compared to Drucilla.
Today, members of the kingdom had sordid opinions about Drucilla's antics. Many pointed out that Josephine had matured, but Drucilla had digressed into a royal embarassment. Yet, Queen Totti was quick to correct people's comments with her own version of reality.
Yes, Queen Totti threw Josephine Half-Baked under the bus, and insisted that Drucilla had actually transformed into a wonderful mother. If anything, Josephine's current behavior was worse than Drucilla's behavior that was displayed at the preliminary event.
Does Josephine know about Queen Totti's betrayal? Would Josephine like to have proof of such scandalous claims?
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Drucilla Dimwitty and her Dum-Dum Dictum
Drucilla is a ticking time bomb, just waiting to explode and ruin the Royal franchise.
When someone gives you press, you do not call the Royal Anchor a slur.
Queen Totti, please get Drucilla under control?
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3sjxyr
Monday, March 2, 2015
Cat Scratch Fever
Drucilla Dimwitty is trying her best to clean up her image. The recent needle photos did not make Mommy Dearest happy, and everyone knows not to anger the Queen.
Drucilla has appealed to Queen Totti for help. It seems as if we have a good old cat fight on our hands, because Drucilla has decided she wants MCM to herself. Queen Totti is only too happy to oblige, because MCM happens to be on the right side of 18.
Only one obstacle stands in Drucilla's was to finding her heart's true desire, and that is "Kick Them In The See You Next Tuesday" Dixie Undertire. However, Totti has a plan, and it just makes get work.
Will Drucilla find happiness? Or is Dixie Undertire ready for a rumble?
Drucilla has appealed to Queen Totti for help. It seems as if we have a good old cat fight on our hands, because Drucilla has decided she wants MCM to herself. Queen Totti is only too happy to oblige, because MCM happens to be on the right side of 18.
Only one obstacle stands in Drucilla's was to finding her heart's true desire, and that is "Kick Them In The See You Next Tuesday" Dixie Undertire. However, Totti has a plan, and it just makes get work.
Will Drucilla find happiness? Or is Dixie Undertire ready for a rumble?
Saturday, February 28, 2015
Drucilla the Gilded has lost her Polish
Drucilla Dimwitty rose to the occasion, just as expected. The timing was hard to pinpoint, but the outcome remained on course. Once again, I am reminded of my dear uncle's dedication to the tenants of his program. Insanity is expecting different results from the same actions.
She is a beauty, no doubt. But the spirited defense of Queen Totti fell by the wayside, and she has once again morphed into a self serving subject. Drucilla has forgotten that the grand ball is coming soon, and her invitation will hinge on her favor of the grand kingdom.
Drucilla's next lesson should be learning how to maneuver in this new period called "the enlightening of the people." Now that the light switch has been flipped on, painting a picture of virtue will be harder to accomplish. The kingdom has become wise to the false images they have been fed for quite some time. Garnering good graces will actually depend on tangible actions demonstrating virtue.
Your move, Drucilla.
She is a beauty, no doubt. But the spirited defense of Queen Totti fell by the wayside, and she has once again morphed into a self serving subject. Drucilla has forgotten that the grand ball is coming soon, and her invitation will hinge on her favor of the grand kingdom.
Drucilla's next lesson should be learning how to maneuver in this new period called "the enlightening of the people." Now that the light switch has been flipped on, painting a picture of virtue will be harder to accomplish. The kingdom has become wise to the false images they have been fed for quite some time. Garnering good graces will actually depend on tangible actions demonstrating virtue.
Your move, Drucilla.
Friday, February 20, 2015
Stitches and Snitches: Fertile Myrtle
All the world is a stage, and dragging in other characters to stab each other in the heart is the name of the game.
Fertile Myrtle: Enter stage left
Fertile Myrtle has been blessed with beauty, and has a bevy of suitors crediting that fact. Fertile Myrtle has had men in her life, but her love of the chase has eliminated any hope of long term commitment. Fertile Myrtle has entered into the grand kingdom with a defined purpose: join Queen Totti's team and take down Josephine.
Fertile Myrtle is beguiling as much as she is beguiled: holding her attention to any task not directly related to the opposite sex will prove taxing to Queen Totti McStotty. However, Totti will do whatever it takes to make Fertile Myrtle her gladiator. She has lost all of her other protectors, some through no fault of her own.
Meany Bigmouth is lying low and polishing her new image sans Totti.
Drucilla Dimwitty's thinly veiled public relations spin has turned into a tornado, spotlighting her ridiculous attempts at being noble.
Will Fertile Myrtle prove to be a valuable asset to Queen Totti? Or will Fertile Myrtle hear the gentleman nymph's siren and quickly go back to her "lover not a fighter" stance?
Fertile Myrtle: Enter stage left
Fertile Myrtle has been blessed with beauty, and has a bevy of suitors crediting that fact. Fertile Myrtle has had men in her life, but her love of the chase has eliminated any hope of long term commitment. Fertile Myrtle has entered into the grand kingdom with a defined purpose: join Queen Totti's team and take down Josephine.
Fertile Myrtle is beguiling as much as she is beguiled: holding her attention to any task not directly related to the opposite sex will prove taxing to Queen Totti McStotty. However, Totti will do whatever it takes to make Fertile Myrtle her gladiator. She has lost all of her other protectors, some through no fault of her own.
Meany Bigmouth is lying low and polishing her new image sans Totti.
Drucilla Dimwitty's thinly veiled public relations spin has turned into a tornado, spotlighting her ridiculous attempts at being noble.
Will Fertile Myrtle prove to be a valuable asset to Queen Totti? Or will Fertile Myrtle hear the gentleman nymph's siren and quickly go back to her "lover not a fighter" stance?
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
It is Lonely on the Throne
Queen Totti McStotty draws strength from the throngs of adoring followers who worship her every move. It is rumored that E.F. Hutton takes tips from Queen Totti. She is THAT good.
Today, Queen Totti has noticed a huge dent in her shiny, rhinestone-studded crown. No matter how much she polishes, nor the number of excuses she makes, her crown is no longer the vision of beauty it once was. Even drudging the court jester's character through the mud cannot negate the obvious attention her dented crown is garnering.
Having torched the bridge to Meany Bigmouth's house, Queen Totti is left in a bind.
Queen Totti McStotty is running out of visible allies. She is desperate, and desperate times call for desperate measures.
Enter Drucilla Dimwitty. Queen Totti knows Drucilla's reputation is tarnished, at best. But desperation is the mother of flawed invention. Drucilla Dimwitty has been summoned to stand in the grand vestibule of Totti's estate. Drucilla Dimwitty, true to form, has begun attacking those challenging the livelihood of Queen Totti. Those attacks include the threat of beheading to Josephine Half-Baked, and if her bark was less than her bite, Josephine would awaken from her slumber and take sword in hand.
A cleaning campaign of Drucilla's character has begun. Remind the loyal subjects of Drucilla Dimwitty's devotion to all things good and pure, Queen Totti has commanded. Bequeath the royal subjects' personal artifacts, like photos of children and gifts, to restore faith in the ruling elite.
Will Drucilla Dimwitty rescue Queen Totti? Or will her shady past come to haunt Drucilla's time in the sun? Drucilla and Queen Totti stand united in common enemy, but is that enough to preserve their relationship?
Today, Queen Totti has noticed a huge dent in her shiny, rhinestone-studded crown. No matter how much she polishes, nor the number of excuses she makes, her crown is no longer the vision of beauty it once was. Even drudging the court jester's character through the mud cannot negate the obvious attention her dented crown is garnering.
Having torched the bridge to Meany Bigmouth's house, Queen Totti is left in a bind.
Queen Totti McStotty is running out of visible allies. She is desperate, and desperate times call for desperate measures.
Enter Drucilla Dimwitty. Queen Totti knows Drucilla's reputation is tarnished, at best. But desperation is the mother of flawed invention. Drucilla Dimwitty has been summoned to stand in the grand vestibule of Totti's estate. Drucilla Dimwitty, true to form, has begun attacking those challenging the livelihood of Queen Totti. Those attacks include the threat of beheading to Josephine Half-Baked, and if her bark was less than her bite, Josephine would awaken from her slumber and take sword in hand.
A cleaning campaign of Drucilla's character has begun. Remind the loyal subjects of Drucilla Dimwitty's devotion to all things good and pure, Queen Totti has commanded. Bequeath the royal subjects' personal artifacts, like photos of children and gifts, to restore faith in the ruling elite.
Will Drucilla Dimwitty rescue Queen Totti? Or will her shady past come to haunt Drucilla's time in the sun? Drucilla and Queen Totti stand united in common enemy, but is that enough to preserve their relationship?
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